A woman was left questioning her three-year relationship after discovering her boyfriend had allegedly paid for private online chats, only to later find him secretly messaging others again months after she forgave him.
In an anonymous confession via XUAN, the woman shared that while her boyfriend treated her well in many ways, his repeated actions had left her feeling hurt, insecure, and unsure about their future together.
Been together for over 3 years
According to the woman, she and her boyfriend had been in a relationship for more than three years.
Throughout their time together, they had argued several times, with most of their fights revolving around the same issue: his lack of boundaries and self control when it came to online content.
She said she understood that couples may have different views on such matters, but what bothered her was how frequent it had become.
The woman claimed that her boyfriend would watch adult content almost every day, both before going to sleep and after waking up.
As his working hours were flexible, he would sometimes return home at noon and say he was tired and wanted to nap. However, she said he would still watch such content before sleeping.
This made her wonder whether it was still a normal habit, or whether it had become a form of dependence.
Told her he was sleeping but was actually online
As the couple were in a long distance relationship due to work, they would video call every night until past midnight.
However, the woman said her boyfriend would often tell her that he was tired and wanted to sleep.
She later found out that when he said he was “going to sleep”, he was actually going online to view such content instead.
To her, it felt like he could not fall asleep without doing so.
She said she had asked him about it several times, but claimed that he never answered her directly and did not seem willing to tell the truth.
Found out he paid for private chats
The turning point came when the woman discovered on his phone that he had allegedly paid someone for private online chats, which left her brokenhearted.
Her boyfriend later apologised repeatedly, saying he was sorry for hurting her and begging her to give him another chance.
In the end, the woman chose to forgive him after he promised to change and for a time, he appeared to hold his end of the bargain.
Found him messaging others again months later
However, a few months later, the woman claimed that she found out he had secretly started using certain apps to engage in inappropriate conversations with others again.
This led to another huge argument between them.
She told him she wanted to break up, blocked him, and made sure he could no longer contact her.
But once again, she eventually softened and this made her start questioning herself.
Am I too love blind? Am I too foolish?” she wondered, asking why she kept giving him chances only to be hurt again.
Families already asking about marriage
What made the situation even harder was that their relationship had already reached a stage where both sides of the family were asking when they would get married.
Despite this, the woman admitted that she no longer knew whether she could continue moving forward with him.
She said that every time he promised to change, he would eventually do something that hurt her again.
She also questioned whether this was really just a mistake that many people make, or whether he simply did not see it as a problem.
Says he treats her well, but the hurt keeps growing
The woman added that aside from this issue, her boyfriend treated her well.
She said he never raised his voice at her and was willing to put effort into the relationship.
However, the repeated incidents had caused her insecurity and emotional pain to grow each time.
Now, she said she feels lost and does not know whether she should continue the relationship or stop for her own sake.
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