Being the eldest often comes with unspoken responsibilities and silent sacrifices.
One Malaysian woman who experienced the privileges of being the eldest now finds herself burdened with guilt — and continues to support her younger siblings, even while raising a family of her own.
A recent post on Threads struck a chord with many, especially those who are the eldest in their families.
Shared by @caramelatteais, the post instantly garnered attention for its raw honesty and quiet strength — showing the weight many eldest siblings silently carry.
“As the eldest, it hurts me when my siblings don’t get what I had”
In her heartfelt post, the woman shared how she had the privilege of studying overseas and exploring the world, while her younger siblings didn’t have the same opportunity.
She began her career with a RM4,000 salary, whereas her siblings are now earning just minimum wage.
Despite that, she makes it a point to top up each of their savings accounts every month — even while raising a family of her own.
Please pray that I’ll be able to provide them with jobs too, at least something for side income,” she wrote.
When she first started working, she was able to save enough money to register for Hajj not just for herself, but also for her three younger siblings.
When my siblings graduated, I gifted each of them a dinar of gold — even though I myself never got a graduation gift.”
Her next goal? To help pay for their wedding expenses when the time comes.
At the same time, she’s working hard to grow her passive income — so she can teach her siblings what to do and what not to do financially.
She ended her post with a line that resonated deeply with other eldest siblings online:
As the eldest, we are often called the pacemakers, right? We clear the path for our siblings to walk through. That’s the natural instinct of the eldest ones.“
Here is the post:
View on Threads
It’s a quiet reminder that being the eldest isn’t just about being born first — it’s about leading, sacrificing, and giving, even when no one asks you to.
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