A 28-year-old woman has opened up about feeling stuck between staying in a long-term relationship and leaving her small city for better career opportunities.
In an anonymous post online, the woman said she and her boyfriend have been together for several years and are currently working and living together in a small city.
She said their relationship is not bad, but over the years, she began to feel that their life goals were slowly moving in different directions.
Wants to leave for better opportunities
The woman said she has been thinking about leaving the city for some time to look for a better job and a different environment.
According to her, her current salary is close to RM4,000, but most of it comes from overtime work, where she often works until 9pm or 10pm before returning to work early the next morning.
Her job also requires her to drive around frequently, which has left her physically and mentally drained.
At times, she said she had stomach pain and headaches, but was still expected to continue working.
Over time, she started feeling that the effort she puts in does not match the income she receives.
Helps cover expenses when BF struggles
Meanwhile, her boyfriend has been working in sales for about a year.
She said he is not lazy, and his performance is not always bad either. However, his income is unstable and he reportedly did not close any sales in the past two months.
After they started living together, she said she has been covering most of the rent and utility bills. When he has extra money, he would help out a little.
But recently, she said even their meals outside were mostly paid for by her.
As he wanted to save money, he would sometimes skip meals, so she began buying groceries and cooking at home instead.
There were also times when she had to lend him money when he could not manage his cash flow.
His iPhone was also bought under her name, and when he was short on money recently, she helped pay the instalments for two months.
Despite this, the woman said she does not think her boyfriend is irresponsible and shared that he has always been patient with her, especially when she loses her temper.
Because of that, she said it is not that she is unwilling to give in the relationship. However, she admitted that she’s tired of having to carry the financial burden most of the time.
‘Are you leaving me?’
Recently, she began seriously thinking about changing jobs and moving elsewhere.
When she told her boyfriend about it, he cried and asked, “Are you trying to leave me?” In response, she tried to comfort him and explained that she only wanted a better future.
However, when he asked if she was thinking of going to Singapore, she could not bring herself to say yes as she was worried about hurting his feelings.
Recently, the couple also viewed an apartment that was being sold at a 30% discount.
While the unit was nice and seemed like a good deal, she started questioning whether they were truly ready.
Looking at their savings and current situation, she felt that buying the apartment would only lock their future in the same city.
But deep down, she was not sure if that was what she really wanted.
Afraid of regretting either choice
The woman said she now feels deeply conflicted. On one hand, she has invested years of time, money, and emotions into the relationship.
On the other hand, she wants a new environment, a higher income, and a chance to change her life, leading her to believe she’s standing at a major crossroad.
