Exclusive Story by WeirdKaya- Proper accreditation to WeirdKaya and consent from the interviewee are required.
Love often grows quietly, especially when it asks people to look past race, traditions, and expectations.
Defying the odds, Sidney Chan and Samini chose love anyway, and today they are happily married, raising two young boys as a living symbol of what can happen when two worlds come together with patience and heart.
When familiarity felt like fate
Back in 2017, Sidney and Samini crossed paths twice on dating apps. The first time, they barely spoke. The second time, Sidney sent a message saying she looked familiar.
Her reply surprised him: “Oh really? Then why haven’t we met yet?”
That single line opened the door to their first date at a café in Damansara Uptown. When Samini walked through the door, Sidney felt something he still struggles to describe to this day.
I felt a magical sensation. Like maybe she was the one,” he shared.
They talked, shared dessert, wandered through shoplots, and Sidney took a portrait of her that day,a simple moment that, somehow, turned into something more.
Before the date ended, she hinted at seeing him again. By the time Sidney got home, he had already messaged his friends with certainty, typing: “She’s the one.”
Samini remembers it differently. For her, there was no lightning bolt moment.
“There was no magical moment where you suddenly feel that this is the one. It was more of a gradual realisation over time that I can be with this person.”
Choosing each other one step at a time
By the third date, Sidney had already made up his mind. After watching a movie together, he gave a small speech and asked Samini to be his girlfriend. To his delight, she said YES.
As the relationship deepened, Sidney felt guided by fate. When Samini’s family found out about the relationship, her father arranged for a meeting with him at the family home.
There, the first question Sidney was asked was not about his career or background, but when he and Samini were getting married.
“That moment gave me insight into Indian culture and the idea of a love marriage—a union chosen by the couple rather than their parents. It also felt like the perfect timing.
I appeared just as they were almost prepared to start searching for a suitor,” he said.
Love in the face of resistance
Unfortunately, being in an interracial relationship meant race would eventually become part of their story.
In the early days, Samini noticed Indian aunties staring into hers and Sidney’s souls in public. Sidney was oblivious at the start, until it eventually became impossible to ignore.
Aside from public judgement, the couple also faced resistance from family members.
“It was one of the stranger moments in my life when I realised my family was reacting in a way that felt it came out of a drama,” Sidney recalled.
I also heard stuff like: ‘Don’t disappoint the family. You can be friends with them but not marry them.’
“They were totally fine when I brought a Chinese girl home. So there was no real excuse other than race being a factor. But they couldn’t answer me why whenever I confronted them.”
Sidney added that one relative commented that his future children would “be neither here nor there”— one he believes is rooted in the fear of losing one’s culture, tradition, language, and legacy.
In the other hand, Samini’s family never rejected Sidney and accepted him open heartedly.
Learning each other’s worlds
While marriage did not erase differences, it helped to softened them over time.
Sidney was already familiar with Hindu temples as he visited several temples with his family as a child. Still, some traditions stood out, especially after their first child was born.
“Our son went through a traditional Indian bathing ceremony during the confinement period.
For outsiders it may look a little overwhelming, but it’s a normal traditional practice.”
Even addressing elders required some adjustment. Sidney learned to call his father-in-law “Mama” (the way Tamil families address their father-in-law), while Samini had to get used to calling Sidney’s parents “Papa” and “Mama”, something that does not exist in Tamil culture.
“It took a while to get used to,” Samini admitted. “In Tamil culture, we usually call in laws Auntie and Uncle.”
Despite these changes, communication was never an issue.
“Sidney’s family talks to me in English. So I didn’t have any problem communicating,” added Samini.
Celebrating everything together
In their home, festivals weren’t celebrated on different days, but it was a shared cultural experience.
During Chinese New Year, Sidney and Samini return to Klang for reunion dinners, tea ceremonies, and family lunches. On Deepavali, both families would gather at their home.
My Chinese nieces would dress up in traditional Indian attire. They play the Disney Diwali song on YouTube and do a dance performance.”
However, food differences still exist, mostly when it comes to spice.
“My wife likes Chinese and Korean food, but I generally don’t like spicy food, which means most Malaysian dishes,” Sidney joked.
When it came to dowries, there was also a sense of balance as Chinese culture requires the groom to pay, while it’s the other way around in Indian culture.
“Basically, our dowries cancel out each other’s expenses,” Sidney said.
Raising children with room to choose
Today, Sidney and Samini are parents to two boys named Darwin and Yashwin.
Because they live close to Samini’s parents, the children were naturally exposed to Hindu traditions at the beginning. As they grew older, Sidney and Samini brought them to both Chinese and Hindu temples.
“I personally would not pressure them into anything. Ultimately they will get to decide what to embrace or what to continue,” said Sidney.
Language at home is mostly English, though they call each other “sayang”.
With her parents, they’re exposed to Tamil and Bahasa Malaysia. With my parents, it’s Hokkien and English. Hopefully they can learn everything”.
Staying together even when it gets hard
For Sidney, giving up was never an option when it came to his relationship with Samini.
Although he admitted that there were difficult moments, especially when his mental health struggles surfaced, Samini stood by him and encouraged him to seek help.
For Samini, she sometimes gets overwhelmed by high expectations, but effective communication keeps both her and Sidney grounded.
“We talk and overcome the issue. Getting therapy also helps.”
Becoming a bridge
Sidney’s family, who were once hesitant, slowly warmed up to his marriage with Samini despite some awkward moments at the start of the relationship.
Their wedding was held on Merdeka Day in 2020 and they began the day with a Chinese tea ceremony before completing Indian rituals at a Hindu temple.
Today, Sidney’s family embraces Samini fully.
In loving each other openly, Sidney and Samini did not just build a family. They became a bridge between cultures and generations, as well as showed what love can truly become when given a chance.
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