A Malaysian wife has sparked discussion online after anonymously sharing her struggles in her marriage, claiming that her husband’s frequent pickleball sessions may not be as innocent as he makes them out to be.
The confession was shared on XUAN’s Facebook page, where the woman opened up about feeling emotionally neglected, suspicious, and increasingly trapped at home while her husband insists he is only going out to exercise and socialise.
She says his sports sessions feel more like matchmaking
According to the wife, her husband regularly travels to different locations to play pickleball, even when the venues are not along his usual route. She claimed he would also check who was attending and look through photos of participants before deciding where to go.
To her, these actions made it difficult not to question his true intentions.
“He said men do not want to talk to him, so he needs to find women. And they must be good looking women,” she wrote, adding that he once questioned why she would suggest he interact with people he deemed unattractive.
She also shared that when she accompanied him to one of these pickleball sessions, he did not play or socialise at all and instead sat quietly. She believed this was because she was present.
She feels judged and pushed aside at home
The woman also described how her husband often criticised her appearance and weight, while behaving very differently when he was out on his own. She said he claimed he could not eat much due to digestion issues, yet had no problem eating large meals outside.
What hurt her most, however, was an incident where her husband told her not to touch him, citing fear of becoming aroused. He justified this by saying she needed to take care of their six year old child and that he had to work the next day.
That moment, she said, made her heart go cold.
She says she has no space of her own as a mother
As a full time caregiver, the wife shared that she spends her days at home caring for their child, with little personal freedom or social life.
Although her husband told her she could go out too, she said she often gave up the idea because there was no one else to look after their child.
While her husband described his outings as socialising and exercise, she felt confined within the walls of her home.
She added that her emotional exhaustion had begun affecting their child, who would cry at night after sensing the tension at home.
Their child becomes caught in the middle
In her confession, the wife revealed that her child once asked why she kept apologising to his father and why she said she should not have given birth to him.
She admitted she regretted saying those words but explained that they came during a moment of emotional breakdown after being scolded by her husband while he was driving.
She said she apologised repeatedly simply to calm him down.
She also claimed that her husband would become angry when their child said he was still hungry, comparing him unfavourably to himself as a quiet and independent child.
She questions what freedom really means
The woman described how her husband accused her of caring only about their child and not about him, yet often ignored her while scrolling through his phone.
She recalled a family outing where she noticed other parents gently accompanying their children, while her husband dismissed their son’s request to look at something and told them to go home instead.
When she questioned his behaviour, he reportedly told her that this was what marriage looked like, with parents walking separately while caring for children.
Now emotionally drained, the wife said she felt unable to wake someone who did not want to change.
She ended her confession by questioning whether the freedom her husband demanded was truly about exercise, or something else entirely.
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