He believed that helping his son was an act of love.
Instead, that love became the very thing that drained his savings, shattered his trust and trapped the entire family in a cycle of debt and denial.
Stole nearly RM300k from father
The story began a few years ago when a Malaysian woman revealed that her older brother had secretly taken almost RM300,000 from their retired father’s ASB savings.
The money had been placed under the siblings’ accounts as the father had reached his account limit, and he trusted his children completely.
The father never imagined that his own son would quietly withdraw the funds over six months and use all of it without permission.
The woman said her father was heartbroken when he discovered the truth. It was his lifelong savings, and losing it felt like a deep personal betrayal.
According to her, the money went into forex, dubious investments, holidays and treating his so called friends to expensive meals. He told the family he was doing business, not revealing the truth behind the spending.
Scammed again and sinking deeper into debt
Although the father eventually forgave him, the situation grew worse. A few months ago, the brother was reportedly scammed again and took a RM20,000 loan from an illegal money lender.
The father, stepped in once more and settled the debt to prevent further trouble.
The woman said her brother, now 31 years old, has not worked since graduating four years ago.
He spends his days in his room, orders food constantly and indulges in premium meals and drinks. She added that he is severely obese and might be struggling with depression after being betrayed by friends he once trusted.
Family tries to intervene but faced resistance
Despite the ongoing issues, the father refuses to stop supporting him. Whenever she tries to advise him, he becomes defensive and accuses her of being jealous of her brother.
Her mother avoids discussing the topic because she is too heartbroken, while her other siblings distance themselves and say the problem belongs to their father alone.
The woman also shared that her sister believes the father is doing a good deed by supporting his son and might even receive spiritual rewards for it, which the poster feels is enabling the behaviour further.
She has repeatedly advised her father to remove whatever funds remain from accounts placed under their names, but his soft heart makes it difficult for him to take firm action.
A family stretched thin
The woman said the entire family is emotionally exhausted. Her brother refuses professional help and no longer meets friends, as they vanished once the money was gone.
He avoids work, avoids responsibility and isolates himself inside his room.
“It hurts seeing him like this. I just hope he does not stay like this until he is in his seventies,” she wrote, adding that she feels alone because no one else in the family wants to acknowledge the problem.
‘You cannot help someone who does not want to help themselves’
Many netizens sympathised with her situation but pointed out that the root cause remains the same. The father’s unconditional support and refusal to impose consequences may have prevented the brother from learning responsibility.
Some reactions include:
“Your brother became like this because your father never let him face real consequences. Too much love becomes poison.”
“You cannot help someone who does not want to help themselves.”
Others raised an important concern about the future: “What will happen when your parents pass away? What is the plan?”
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