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Most people walk into a barbershop looking for a haircut. But for 73-year-old Darmalingam Manickam, every snip of his scissors is a moment of connection, patience, and love.
He has been cutting hair for more than 40 years, but what makes his work truly special is his bond with autistic children. They are not just his clients; they are his inspiration and his joy.
“Seeing these beautiful children makes me feel young again,” he noted with a gentle smile.
A sister who showed him what love meant
Darmalingam’s compassion for special needs children began right at home, where his younger sister was born with a disability which made her paralysed from the waist down until the age of five.
At the time, the family did not understand what autism was and thought something was simply “wrong” with her. After undergoing traditional treatments, she regained the ability to walk, but her speech delay remained.
Despite the challenges, Darmalingam always saw her as his teacher, mentor, and biggest source of inspiration in his life.
Through her, he learned the meaning of patience, kindness, and acceptance, lessons that would one day shape his life’s purpose.
Civil servant-turned-barber with a mission
Before becoming a full-time barber, Darmalingam worked at Jabatan Telekom Malaysia in 1974 and later with Telekom Malaysia after its privatisation.
While he had a stable job, his heart longed for something more meaningful. His father, who was a barber, did not want him to follow in his footsteps.
Despite the former’s reservations, Darmalingam attended the Academy of Hairdressing in Kuala Lumpur. After practising for two years, he opted for an early retirement in 2001 to dedicate himself fully to hairdressing and has never looked back since.
His motto? It was simply discipline, rules, and quality first.
But when parents began telling him their autistic children were being turned away by other salons, he knew he had found his true calling.
Darmalingam started welcoming them with open arms, determined to make his salon a safe place for every child. Soon, Autism Malaysia began recommending him to parents.
I never wanted fame, but when people heard about what I do and felt happy, that was enough for me.”
Finding beauty in every challenge
Over the years, Darmalingam developed his own way of working with autistic children. He believes no child is too difficult or restless to receive care and love.
In his own words, they’re simply “angels” to him.
Darmalingam often comforts parents who arrive at his salon feeling anxious or embarrassed. Some children refuse to sit still, lie on the floor, or start crying halfway through the hairdo.
But he never gave up. He simply adjusted by sometimes sitting on the floor or letting them play while keeping a calm voice.
He explained that normal clients can tell you what they want and stay still, but with autistic children, every haircut is unpredictable. Yet when they feel loved and safe, they slowly relax.
When I put myself in their shoes, everything goes smoothly. You just have to move along with them, and they will trust you.”
Unforgettable moments
One notable example occurred fifteen years ago when Darmalingam handled his first autistic child, a four-year-old boy who could not sit still. The haircut had to be done outside the studio with the help of four adults while enduring endless kicks from the child.
Today, that boy is 19 and still visits the salon regularly in a much calmer and affectionate demeanor. Each time he arrives, he hugs and kisses Darmalingam.
Another example involved another young autistic boy who came for a haircut but the process proved to be difficult.
When Darmalingam was done, the boy pressed his palms together and bowed slightly to thank him before leaving. It was a small gesture, yet it left a deep impression on him.
I felt like an angel was standing in front of me. I will never forget that moment.
“Moments like these remind me why I continue doing what I’m doing. I never received formal training and everything I know simply came from observing my sister, years of experience, and deep empathy for the children who sit on my salon’s chair.”
Success beyond money
Like many small businesses, Darmalingam’s salon suffered during the Covid-19 pandemic, and nearly closed down for good. But even when times were tough, he refused to give up on his mission.
“Being rich has nothing to do with money. What matters is doing good for others and finding meaning in your work.
My happiness comes from these children. They balance me with their love and emotions.”
His salon now serves around 200 autistic children every month, sometimes as many as ten in a single day, where each child comes with a different story, and each haircut strengthens his belief that kindness can truly change the world.
Darmalingam’s story is one of quiet strength and unconditional love. From his sister to the many children he has served, he has turned his skill into a lifelong act of compassion.
He says he will continue cutting hair for as long as his hands allow him to hold a pair of scissors.
I’m doing this job for angels, not kids. And as long as I can, I’ll keep going.” he said with pride.
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