A 33-year-old Malaysian man recently shared his frustration online after revealing that his girlfriend refuses to marry him unless he owns a house.
In a post, he said he earns slightly above RM3,000 a month.
Not a high salary, but I’ve always worked hard and seriously planned for the future,” he wrote.
Wants to save for a house before marriage
According to him, his girlfriend often says she will not get married without having their own property.
He agreed with her view, saying that renting in Malaysia does not provide a sense of security.
For the past two years, he has been cutting down expenses to save money.
He shared that he rarely goes out, avoids unnecessary spending, and even turns down invitations from friends to reduce costs.
Lifestyle spending becomes a concern
However, he pointed out that while they talk about saving for a house, his girlfriend enjoys buying branded handbags, upgrading to new smartphones, and visiting trendy cafes.
He claimed that many of these expenses were paid using his credit card.
I thought it was okay to pamper her at first,” he wrote. “But slowly it became iPhone is my card, travel is my card, even instalments are under my name.”
Debt and pressure
The man said he now carries credit card debt due to these commitments.
Whenever he brings up financial stress, he claims his girlfriend accuses him of lacking ambition.
She allegedly tells him that if he truly wants to marry her, he should work harder and earn more.
Torn between responsibility and reality
He admitted feeling conflicted. On one hand, he believes men should take on more responsibility in a relationship.
On the other hand, he questions whether their goal of buying a house is realistic when their current lifestyle continues to increase expenses.
He also shared that he has become afraid to talk about money, as any discussion about finances often leads to arguments.
Asks if the issue is ability or compatibility
The man ended his post by asking whether the issue lies in his financial capability, or if the relationship itself may not be aligned from the start.
The post quickly gained traction, with many netizens voicing strong opinions.
One commenter wrote, “Don’t be foolish. If she truly cares about you, she would plan your future together with you, not keep draining it.”
Another netizen shared, “Instead of being with someone who doesn’t appreciate your efforts, I would rather stay single and treat myself better until the right person comes along.”
Some were more direct. “Just break up. Trust me. Don’t do something you’ll regret,” one comment read.
Another added, “The problem is not your RM3,000 salary. The problem is your girlfriend.”
A different user commented, “Saving alone is not hard. What’s hard is when you are saving, and she is undoing your savings.”
